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  • Jeff Kent

Free Love

Ephesians 5:25-30


Back in the 1960's and 70's during what was later termed as the “sexual revolution” a phrase was coined - “free love.” The idea was that love - by which sex was implied - should be without any attachments. There would be no personal commitments, no restrictions regarding partners and certainly no marriages. This idea continues with us today as people continue to disregard God’s design for “love” and indulge themselves in all types of sexual activity outside of a marriage covenant.

If we examine this concept of “free love,” we notice two important things. First, the word “love” has been hijacked to mean something other than what it truly is. Second, it is a contradiction.

Love is not a synonym for sex. Neither is love only about having “feelings” for someone. Love is devotion. In his instructions about marriage, Paul tells husbands to love their wives “just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.” In using Christ’s example of love for the church, Paul very clearly spells out the nature of love. It is fully devoted to another for their good, even to the point of giving one’s life for their benefit. This is love at its finest. But love also expresses itself in small acts of kindness and deference such as making your spouse’s cup of tea; putting the dishes away; encouraging your spouse to choose the restaurant; overlooking little irritations; seeing to your spouses' needs when she is ill, etc.

In looking at Christ’s love for the church which is enjoined upon husbands for their wives, one sees the contradiction in the term “free love.” Love isn’t free, and true lovers don’t want to be free. In fact, they bind themselves together in a marriage covenant in which they pledge their full devotion to one another through “richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.” They pledge their faithfulness to one another just as Christ demonstrated His love for the church and gave His life for her. Lovers wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Free love?” No such thing. The word of God says so.

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